Slow Burn

Heat wave taking its time to get outta town. ConEd batting back well-deserved hits for more blackouts. Lightning and lights. Please.

Shane Lowry a happy champion at the Open. Not a contested finish. But. Brooks Koepka may have given him a run had it not been for the dawdling by his partner JB Holmes. Put your glove on. Get out your club. Strategize with your caddie. Before it is your turn! Take the shot.

Slow Play. Ruining the game.

Costly Cuts

OZY-Fest cancelled in Central Park. It’d be bad to have a baked crowd on the Great Lawn. Costly for promoters A-Rod & Co. Park wasn’t happy anyway about the profit-making show. So.

An hour-long CNN event last night. To pick 20 names out of a hat. Seriously. Dems split debate July 30 & 31. Bernie and Lizzie with a light-weight first night. Second stage stronger with Harris v. Biden again.

Over at the British Open. Not many marquee players made the cut. Leaders going in beards & bellies. JB & Shane. And Woods. No not Tiger. Fleetwood & Westwood. Sad about Rory. It’d be great to see Lee do it. Joey3Sticks picks all still in the hunt.

North Coast Links

The Open Championship at Royal Portrush in Northern Ireland. Joey3Sticks picks Xander Schauffele, Tommy Fleetwood, Jon Rahm.

I’ll take 2 countrymen Rory McIlroy & GMac and then the guy who made the brilliant move to hire a caddy from the course Club. Brooks Koepka. Local knowledge is everything on this links terrain. In wind and rain.

Stay cool and watch on record. Don’t text any spoilers!

 

Photo: G. Levine. Connemara, Ireland. Circa 2002.

Miller Times

Chug your favorite brew. All day. It’s Miller times. Elizabeth Warren graces the cover of New York magazine this morning with the headline, Front Runner?  Ocasio-Cortez and Bernie are in the heartland preaching free everything. Meanwhile, Tweeter-in-Chief is threatening war with Iran. And Michael Cohen is no Ray Donovan, breakfasting with Al Sharpton at the Regency.

Over in Torino, Italia, la famiglia Molinari, the Millers, are celebrating Francesco’s British Open win. A 35-year old’s solid steady showing. Navigated the gourses between the frat house boys and the geezers to hoist the coveted claret jug. Tiger came close. For a minute.

Gale Storm

Howling rain. A Summer Nor’Easter hitting NYC. Lashing the dormant air conditioner as cool fresh air wafts in through narrowly cracked windows. Only people to be seen outside along Central Park West tonight are hunched over with inside-out umbrellas.

Gusts may pick up at the British Open final on Scotland’s coast tomorrow. Looks to be survival of Carnoustie’s Caddy Shack. American millennial housemates. Little rat farts are dominating the links. Spieth. Kisner. Johnson. Fowler. Could a geezer ever break wind?

Gale Storm was a Fifties actress. No. Not Stormy Daniels. Gale played My Little Margie where she looked older than her father on an old timey tv show. She also later had her own eponymous sit-com. With Zazu Pitts. That’s correct.

Open Bunkers

British Open at Carnoustie in Scotland. Down the road from Trump’s Turnberry. He should have stayed there and never gone to Helsinki. But. Back to golf. Nick Faldo’s former winning caddie Fanny Sunnesson will be on Adam Scott’s bag. That’s a pair to watch. Nick picks Jon Rahm to win. Others are going with Rickie Fowler, saying it’s finally his time. Could this be Tiger’s true return to greatness? Probably not. Hope springs. Rory. Rosie. Phippy. Dustin. Justin. I say a random unknown will take the claret jug.

So. Set the DVR for 1:30 AM. Coffee and pot bunkers await.

GOT Mail?

Not chainmaille. Chain mail. Raven post. Separate messages from Sam & Tyrion to Jon Snow that could change fortunes at Dragonstone. Is Bran the only one who knows Jon’s true relationship to Khaleesi? A confrontation to come with Cersei? We’ll see. Get rid of Littlefinger & Varys. They are whores who can never be trusted.

Email will be center stage this week. From Jared to Junior. Trump’s tweeter is off the rails. Memo to Sessions. Bye. Bye. Already. And. Prognostication about Speith’s British Open choke was premature. He was starting to prove me right on early holes Sunday, then had a miraculous rally. If he didn’t take so long to make a shot, he’d be worth watching.