Winter is coming. Just ask Jon Snow. Drifting flakes as Bran recalls Sansa’s wedding night rape. Meanwhile. Poisoned goblets and kisses. Cersei is the most imaginative avenger. Apologies to Diana Rigg. Over at Dragonstone, Jon’s mining dragon glass as Sam saves Joran’s… skin. Khaleesi’s armed with Tyrion’s underground past. Will any of her minions last? White walkers are just over the wall. Arya better get home fast. Before the snowfall.
House of Vulgarian
House of Vulgarian. West Wing locker talk. Scaramouche cannot contain his bouche. Expectorating expletives. Causing chaos and confusion. Trump is a happy man. Crass communications director is crazier than he. Tee hee! Jeff Sessions slimed. Reince Priebus slammed. Steve Bannon. Well. He’s clearly a contortionist. Game on. Dragons aside. Winter is here. If Shortfingers is laughing, the country can panic. Start now.
As McCain sticks his Valerian sword into McConnell over at the House of Dome.
GOT Mail?
Not chainmaille. Chain mail. Raven post. Separate messages from Sam & Tyrion to Jon Snow that could change fortunes at Dragonstone. Is Bran the only one who knows Jon’s true relationship to Khaleesi? A confrontation to come with Cersei? We’ll see. Get rid of Littlefinger & Varys. They are whores who can never be trusted.
Email will be center stage this week. From Jared to Junior. Trump’s tweeter is off the rails. Memo to Sessions. Bye. Bye. Already. And. Prognostication about Speith’s British Open choke was premature. He was starting to prove me right on early holes Sunday, then had a miraculous rally. If he didn’t take so long to make a shot, he’d be worth watching.
Scaramouche
Commedia dell’arte’s Scaramuccia. The skirmisher, a mainstay character in the Punch & Judy Italian puppet opera. Swashbuckling minstrel with Über Swagger. Donald’s newly appointed media leader. Anthony Scaramucci. Unlike Spicey. Sartorially-savvy. Brioni suits. A compact Queens communicator. Better fits the role. Salesman by trade. Financier. Goldman Sachs to Skybridge. From the campaign to the transition. A loyal jester in the modern Game of Trump.
Can he pull off a miraculous messaging show?
See also: Scaramouche Fandango, Bohemian Rhapsody, Queen. John Kerry’s former yacht anchored off Naushon Island.
House of Shards II
1:08 PM. Frank Underwood Trumped. Can’t make this up. Doddering Don throws his Attorney General under the bus. Threatens Special Counsel. Calls in the New York Times to put it all on the record. Spicey and Melissa McCarthy out. Scaramucci in. Junior donning a flack jacket. ‘JIvanka’ still around. For now. New York contingent rising. Eric smart to stay far away. Tiffany partying in the Hamptons. Barron hiding behind Mommy Melania’s de Schooten skirt.
Everybody waiting for the next Manolo Blahnik to drop.
Donald Badenov II
Donald Badenov is back. From G20 vith Love. Finally met Putin in Person.
“Ring-a-ding-ding. Dis is some vild and crazy guy. Schving!! Playboy centerfold Melania charmed Vlad the Buff Vampire Slayer even better than Natasha could. Putin vill never be the same after she laughed at all his muscovian jokes. Ha ha! Who needs Vodka? Ve got along so good. Better than borscht. Don’t know vy everybody is so upset ve had another secret meeting vith no vitnesses. You vill all be sorry ven ve have negotiated the “Caviar Accord”. Peace and hotels all over the vorld. Get over it CNN. Dahz. Veedahnya.”
Shakespeare Garden
Lunch on a mid-July day in the lush Shakespeare Garden. Central Park.
GOT Books?
Game of Thrones returns. After reviewing the last two episodes of gory wars, exploding bodies, and dogs’ ravenous dinner of Ramsay, Season 7 began. It couldn’t get grosser, could it? Oh yes. How does a library become a cesspool. Literally. There are tomes and turds galore. And.
Speaking of bad reads. Leaving Lucy Pear, Solomon’s “mother load” touted by WaPo, is a dud.
Macron! Macron!
Le jour de gloire? Why did freshly minted President Emmanuel Macron of France invite Le Donald to be honored at Bastille Day? What is he up to? This guy seems a rogue in his own right. Is he setting up Trump for an awkward contretemps? Marchons. Nous voyons. It’ll be worth seeing what Melania will wear where Dior and Louboutins rule.
Scaffold Hostage Freed!
Victory! After years of dank iron webbing covering this clothing stalwart on 81st & Columbus, Frank Stella is finally scaffold-free. Yay! The crusade continues. Also on West Side Rag.
Side Trek . NYC 